If we want something from someone, or from the universe, or from the higher power we believe in, I think it should be a prerequisite that we be willing to give that same thing (whatever it is that we want) to others.
If we want others to accept us for exactly who we are without judgment…shouldn’t we be willing to accept others without being judgmental?
If we want forgiveness for something we have either done, or left undone…shouldn’t we be willing to forgive others for the things they have done or left undone?
If we are asking for the doors of opportunity to open up for us, shouldn’t we be willing to take every possible opportunity to see the abundance that we already have and make the very most of it?
You get where this is going. I know you do. But I want to appeal to you to not pass this off as one of those “of course I get it” messages because being willing to give the very thing that we are asking for is a lot harder than we think. Or, at least it is for me.
I have actually heard my own thoughts rattling around in my head saying something like,
“If so & so would just stop judging me and accept me for exactly who I am, we would be able to work together towards our common goal. We both are committed to this project.” Not too terribly long after having that exchange with myself, I actually heard my own thoughts saying something like, “I can’t believe how old-fashioned so & so is and how antiquated his views are on so many social issues! He needs to wake up and admit we are in the twenty-first century!” Honestly, how can I expect to be accepted and not judged in this situation? I am clearly not accepting him and I am clearly giving him a dose of my own style of judgment. Have you ever done that?
Are you asking for things that you are not willing to give?
I submit to you that in order to fully receive anything, we must be willing to give that very thing to others. And even before we can truly give it to anyone else, we must first be willing to give it to ourselves.
It’s not possible to live without judging others if you are busy judging yourself. Likewise, you cannot have a forgiving heart if you will not forgive yourself. And, if you don’t have a grateful heart for all that you already have, it is unlikely that any opportunity given to you, even if the door is kicked wide open on your behalf, will satisfy your longing.
So, in order to experience acceptance, forgiveness, opportunity, love, and for that matter all the other things we want in this life, the place to start is with ourselves.
Have the relationship with yourself that you want to have with others. And whenever you find yourself asking for something from someone else, make sure you are first giving that very thing to yourself.
We are creating our lives…one decision at a time.
I welcome your comments and I’d love for you to share this post if you’d like. And if you really want to stay in touch, subscribe to best I have in the upper right corner. Thanks for being here!