If You Compare, Be Prepared To Suffer



I have had it. I am declaring that I am going to stop comparing where I am in my life to where anyone else is in theirs.

Where I am in my life is not about anyone else. It’s about me.

Where anyone else is in their life is, most definitely, not about me. It’s about them.

So, I am going to stop with my lifelong habit of comparing. (long, slow, deep, deep breath)

OK, what’s more realistic is that I’m going to try like the devil to start noticing that when I compare myself and my life to anyone else’s, I often feel like crap. And then I’m going to gently remind myself that rather than comparing, when I notice that there are differences between me and other people, I and going to gently ask the question, “So what?”


So what that there are differences between me and another person?

Of course there are! They are them and I am me.

My friend who has the perfect body is not me and neither is my friend with the body that has some extra pounds on it. So what, my body is different from theirs? Same thing goes for the difference between my bank account and theirs, and e.v.e.r.y.t.h.i.n.g else that’s way more important!

But if I compare myself to them, I sure make a mess of things! I can feel “less than” my perfect-bodied friend and I can feel “better than” my not-so-perfect-bodied friend.


“Less than” and “better than” are so not who I want to be. You either, right? But if  we compare ourselves to others, how can we expect a different result? The nature of comparing is to find the differences or similarities between things. That might be handy when comparing different THINGS, but when it comes to the differences between us and other people, seriously, so what?

Wouldn’t it be so much better to own your own life and get busy becoming who you want to be rather than hurting yourself by comparing yourself to anyone else?

There will be differences between us and other people but let’s not make the mistake of making those differences create feelings of “less than” or “better than” within us. Let’s not choose to suffer like that. (And speaking of suffering, take a look at Facebook’s role in this dilemma.)

Let’s make a better choice. From a place of love and kindness, let’s let what others have created in their lives be about them. And then let’s get busy deciding who we want to be and use our life energy to build that life for ourselves.

We are all creating our lives with each decision and choice we make. Decide who you want to be becoming and choose actions that line up with that.

What you do next matters . . .

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